Ruby
Ruby, 22, Tauranga
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So I think I got my period when I was 13, and then I had one period and it was horrible. So I went straight onto contraception, the Depo. And then was on that for years. And then we went away to Auckland one night, and I was just in immense pain, and I couldn't figure out why I couldn't sleep or anything. And then that pain never went away. I went to hospital, and they're like, "Dunno." So I stopped working for about three months. Because I just... I couldn't get out of bed. It was literally had to crawl to the toilet. It was so bad. I lost about 10kgs 'cause nothing was happening. And then I got a gynecologist, and he started me on pelvic floor physio. That made it worse. So the physio was just like, "I can't give you any sort of relief." He said, "I think you have endometriosis."
Endometriosis runs in my family. My mom has it. My nana has it. My older sisters have it, two of them. And then the wait for the surgery was about two years or something. Oh my gosh. So I decided I couldn't wait that long, so I had the surgery. You went private for the surgery? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And that was like 22 grand. Had that done and then— It didn't help, so every month I just sort of have to manage. And then just multiple hospital visits just to try and get some relief.
And then in last year, July... I had an ovarian cyst... that burst. And then I got another ovarian cyst afterwards. And because of what I went through, I had PTSD. And it was giving me a lot of pain. So I had ultrasound. And they said it's going to destroy my ovaries and my tubes if it continues to grow. 'Cause it was making my ovaries kiss. It was actually, like, molding into both my ovaries. And slowly destroying everything? My gynecologist said, um, "We need to put you on contraception." I said, "Contraception doesn't work." He was like, "Well, we're gonna take the extreme route." So he put me onto Zoladex. It's been great ever since then.
I have really bad anxiety and stuff like that. Yeah. So I don't go out. I don't even do my groceries. So this has really helped just to get me out again. Me and my partner went away for the night, glamping. And it got to about 10 o'clock, and we were both getting ready for bed, and I couldn't lay down flat, and laid down and had a panic attack 'cause I couldn't breathe. I couldn't talk properly 'cause I couldn't catch my breath. So he got me dressed, carried me to the car, and luckily the hospital was only fifteen minutes away.
At this stage, I didn't realize how sore my stomach was, 'cause I was more worried about my breathing and stuff like that. And she touched my stomach— Mm... ever so slightly, and I screamed at her, which freaked her out, freaked me out. And from there on, I was vomiting. Just everything was just trying to get out of my system to make room for the blood.
"So they did an ultrasound. Yeah, something's not right. And the gynecologist on call came in, 'cause I, I was going into sepsis. I have the transfusion, then seed Someone else is before you. It'll be a little bit.
At this stage I was happy 'cause I was drugged up galore. But I was, like, full body shaking 'cause of all the adrenaline. And then the nurse came back and she's like, "No, you're going right now." So they wheeled me to the surgical room. That was hectic though, 'cause I had pants on, and there was about 10 doctors in there, and some of them were learning. So the anesthesiologist or someone was like, "Oh, can you take your pants off?" Like, "We need to take, put a catheter in." This time I was still awake, and I was like— Mm... "Could you not just wait until I was asleep?" Like, I don't really wanna know this shit.
And then by that time I was out, and then I woke up, and my partner was right beside me. They said, "We managed to save your ovary"— "which is great." 'Cause it full, it like fully burst my ovary open. I looked like I was pregnant.
It is a whole body illness. Physically and mentally. Like endometriosis, when you do have the pain, everyone's different, everyone has different pains. But when you have it as bad as some people, it's as bad as bloody giving birth. 100%. You can't function, you can't move. It's literally like you're pushing something out that isn't there. Or will nev— like w— won't be there.
There's not enough medical research, not enough people understand it, or they understand it but they don't know the extent, especially with partners and stuff like that. They don't actually realize what your body's going, what you're going through.
I don't understand why it hasn't been spoken about, like especially with like my parents and stuff like that. I think it was just because it was a part of her daily life. She didn't realize that it was hereditary. Or it could be passed down. Or anyone really f— spoke about that sort of stuff. Like when you speak about your periods and stuff it's taboo—but it shouldn't be. Make them understand, like periods are not supposed to be painful. Or they're not supposed to be to the extent of what you have.
I think way more needs to go in teaching our younger generation. Pain's not normal. It should really be taught in schools. Like we learn about sex ed and stuff like that. Reach out to the communities. There's so many communities out there. Endo Warriors Aotearoa. She did me a surgery box. When I first did my, had my surgery and that saved so much. Just, and she gave me a pamphlet of like what to take to the hospital. Recovery afterwards, like just—
Definitely reach out 'cause people are going through the exact same bloody thing. If you have pain or if you think so, or just if you have periods. Research it. Look into those things.
Ruby at home in Tauranga